Thursday, May 19, 2011

What happens next?

Lately I've found myself asking this question a lot.
Mark didn't get back into USU. Which means that while I will be moving back to Logan come August....he will not.
I have GREAT roommates that will keep me me plenty busy I'm sure....but I was so looking forward to seeing him all the time like we used to. Even if it was just for an hour....
This will not be happening. Not until spring semester at least. This makes me really depressed.
I at least managed to eat super unhealthy today....but when I got the news from Mark yesterday....that was a different story. I had onion rings and a milkshake. If you know anything about me when I'm upset....I crave food. Onion rings being the primary craving. That or Phish food. Which I really wanted but didn't get. I settled for the milkshake. Which was even more unhealthy.
Then I worked a 10 1/2 hour day and pretended like everything was fine. It was. Until I got home and realized that it wasn't.
My eternal optimism got thrown back into my face. It was more logic than anything else. So then I start calming down when I think about it logically.
I organize every little worry into a neat little pile. But while I do that I have to examine it, remember why that was a worry to begin with. Then I forget why I bothered organizing them to begin with.
I try to organize myself into some sort of form that I can manage. I keep getting told I don't have compassion by the customer's at work, because  I won't release them from their contract. My intelligence is questioned. I try not to be rude and the only think that keeps me biting my tongue is the fact that I know I'm smarter than them and I have the power. Give me the weekend. I need a break from these 10 hour days. 
eat sleep work eat sleep work eat sleep work eat sleep work


1 comment:

TaytertheTotter said...

Well Mikayla, it looks like we're gonna be two peas in a pod come August 24th (I think that's our move in date isn't it?) :( Hang in there. We'll have to go on some wicked awesome adventures. Or something. :)